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CHoPS

__________ on a plane.

10.24.08 | 1 Comment

Before we get started…I’m down Mav, I’ll be sending you ideas.
secondly, the movie I’m about to post over, I’ve never seen, nor do i plan(e) to.  DONT BELIEVE THE HYPE.

So its the 75th anniversery of the release of Snakes on a Plane, and the 109th anniversery of the movie from which it was based, Jack Rabbits On a Stage Coach.

Here are 10 ideas for the new remake that is currently in the works.

10.  Shauns on a Plane.
   -that dumb little snowboarding twit has been involved in a cloning accident (following the cloneing rules from Multiplicity) bring four shauns to the coach section of a cross country flight.  They’ve talked security into letting them bring their snowboards onto the flight as carry ons.  following the rules of Multiplicity the forth shaun is an even bigger moron and brought along a circa 1987 big wheel. 

9.  Simmons on a plane.
   -Richard simmons on a plane…and were going to pump him full of estrogen and wine coolers.  ‘Nuff said

8.  Stuff on a plane
   -the cast has accidently booked their flight out of the south on the way to the worlds largest swap meet in Oregon.  the supporting cast has brought their swap Items in plastic shopping bags, all stored in the overhead storage compartment.  when the main characters open the overhead to grab their MP3 player, a flintstones like closet avalance takes place.  place everyone smells like, well flea market people and are wearing floral moo-moos.

7.  Shit on a Plane
   -Mothers bring newborns on a plane.  Small flight.  Small plane.  no changing area.

6.  Seal on a Plane.
   -The main character is a regional sales rep for nabisco, that fights insomnia, and the only chance he gets to sleep are on private charter flights.  due to the economy his employer starts to book others on these flights at “the right price”  as soon as the main character falls asleep he’s awakened by “kissed By a Rose”.  His entire 5 hour fight is filled with Seal tunes.  Only singles.

5.  Seals on a plane.
   -in a straight to video release, using COMPUTERS the snakes are removed from Snakes on a Plane and replaced with Seals.  Dialogue remains the same

4.  Sailors on a plane.
   -in a freak accident…the pilots on a flight home for some navel officers have gotten food poisening.  every body on the plane is in the Navy…Sea-men.  they are fucked…

3.  Sperm on a plane
   -A plane load of male porn stars, all chock full of viagra and horny goat weed gets stuck on the runway for 9 hours.  The bathroom is inoperable.  the movie is filmed and shown in real time.

2.  Snakes on a plain.
   – Snakes on a flat surface. 

1.  Samuels on a plane. 
   -Role reversal plays out as a muppet snake has to deal with 20 loud obnoxious Samuel L. Jacksons.

CHORPS JORGANSON

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